Monday, August 14, 2017

My Hungarian Heritage


Mary and I are going to Hungary in September. I asked my mother about our family history and this is what she wrote ...

Hi Steve,

For your upcoming trip to Hungary, here is all I have about ancestors.

Do you want photos? I'm not into copying and sending photos but can copy them and mail you copies.

First, though, it is Boldva BAZ (the county is Borsod-Abaúj-Zemplén) Hungary where Sophie went for visits.

Here are some details dad got from Sophie.

Mother's maiden name: Sophie (or Sopha, maybe dad was trying to write Sophia), born February 20 1909 iin Calumet Pennsylvania.

Sophie died after she turned 89 in 1998.

Father's name: Steve Bencze (Istvan or Pista), born May 1907, Toledo Ohio.

Maternal grandmother: Elizabeth (Erzsebet) Egyed, born July 23, 1883. probably in Sajo Kereszur, Borsod Megye, Hungary.

Maternal grandfather: Sandor Veres, Born in 1877 or 1878 in Hungary.

Paternal grandfather: Unknown. Probably died in1918-1920. Born in Hungary.

Paternal grandfather: Steve (Istvan or Pista) Bencze. Probably born in Hungary about 1879-1880. Died in 1937 or 1938, Buried in Cleveland, Ohio.

I can add what I remember Sophie telling me.

Sophie's mother came to the States to bring from Hungary one or more children to be reunited with parents who were in Pennsylvania. She married while in the States and had two daughter's. Sophie's father sent his wife and two children back to Hungary when Sophie was 2 month's old and her sister was a toddler. Sophie's mother suffered seasickness and the toddler carried a cup around so fellow passengers could give her food.

The three of them went to live with the husband's family. The plan was to have the father work in the States and send money to Hungary to be saved for buying land. Sophie's mother was not happy with the situation. Sophie remembers her mother crying during the night.

Getting enough money saved did not go smoothly. One time the government declared all the Hungarian money nearly worthless and set up a new monitary system. Sophie's mother ended up with not enough money to buy a pair of boots. They had to start over with saving.

Sophie's father made several trips to Hungary to visit and left his wife pregnant each time. I think she gave birth six times but Sophie talked only about the older sister, a younger sister and a brother.

Sophie quit talking to the older sister because of the greed her sister always expressed and especially because when Sophie left Hungary at 18, the older sister lied to the family and said Sophie had relinquished her inheritance to that sister. When Sophie visited Hungary for the first time, after WW II, she discovered the lie and never spoke to that sister again.

Sophie visited a younger sister who was about 5 years older than me.

Even amassing enough money to buy land wasn't easily effective because sale of land was almost nonexistent. But finally someone died and the family sold 8 acres of worn out land to Sophie's parents. The father worked hard to restore those 8 acres, having to use a cow where a horse was needed.

The father returned to Hungary when Sophie and her older sister were teenagers and the brother was 10 years old. Thus the only help he could get were from three children who saw him as a virtual stranger and who were unable to live up to the work expectations he had for them. He had been living as a bachelor and had he experiences with family relationships.

Not a happy situation. Tha brother ran away from home. I don't know at what age. He never returned and tney never heard anything about what happened to him.

When Sophie was 18, a decision was made to send her to the States for what they thought would be a better life. The older sister had already decided she would stay in Hungary.

Sophie knew no English and ended up living in the Hungarian neighborhood in Cleveland. Her first job was working in the home of a Hungarian. Your dad did not speak English when ne started. Fortunately he had a Hungarian teacher for his first class.

Sophie couldn't read English but helped as best she could with homework and learned to read along with your dad.

That is enough for now. I won't get into why the marriage ended in divorce when your dad was eight.

The reason I know so many details is that I askec Sophie to tell me about her life.

Love, Mom

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